Saturday, February 22, 2014

Brave new Hallmark world

Valentine's day card
     Now that we are married, a whole new world of Hallmark cards has opened up to us.  We gave each other Valentine cards from the "To My Wife" section.  Ever since I dwindled into a wife at a very young age, I have not wanted to be called anyone's wife.  Now, with Judy, it is different.  It's only a little surprising, and not at all disturbing,  to be called a wife. It's more like something new that I will get used to.  I  now refer to Judy as  "my bride" rather than "my partner."
Another version
     Of course, we want to claim all the the rights and privileges of marriage, including the all-important right to grouse about your spouse.
    For my birthday this year, we followed our tradition.  Judy ordered a special chocolate cake, and we celebrated with cake and tea.  I got to talk to my sons and daughters-in-law and each of my grandchildren, plus many other family members.  At Roxie's tea, it is the tradition to sing "Happy Birthday" in  harmony to the tune of Hyfyrdol.  As they sang to me, I soaked in the rich sound of the voices of those bright, strong women.
   I smiled at the card from Sheila that welcomed me to the Wonder Years-- as in "I wonder where I put my glasses? I wonder where I parked the car?" And from Florrie, the one that said, "This could be the year you start blurting out your ailments to perfect strangers  as in "I can't wear those shoes.  They hurt my bunions."Judy found a birthday card in the "Wife-Humorous" section.  
     But I am over sixty-five, not over eighty-five.  Sixty-five is different from eight-five, isn't it?  Or did I already ask you that?
New kind of birthday card

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Death Valley Days

Artist's Drive, Death Valley
     As a Christmas present to me, Judy planned every detail of a trip to Death Valley.  She had visited the valley several times as a young woman.   She wanted to see it again and to introduce me to the stark beauty of the lowest spot in North America.
Red Rock Canyon, Nevada
    We flew into Las Vegas.  The casinos are mammoth buildings.   From our 8th floor room at the Excalibur, there was no way to get  coffee, or reach the food court,  or find a Wi-Fi hot spot, or open a door to the outside without walking thorough the  acre of flashing lights and noises and garish colors  that was the casino.  I began to appreciate the part of the path that took me by the black jack tables and roulette wheels;  there were only people there, no machines.
Badwater, 282 feet below sea level
   From Vegas we drove to Death Valley by way of Red Rock Canyon, and  began to soak in the unusual beauty of the bare rock mountains surrounding the narrow valley.  The colors and shapes of the layers of rock somehow make the solid wall of cliffs seem fluid and dynamic.  It was mesmerizing, the way gazing the ocean is. After a few days with those rocks, I felt the way I used to after watching whales.
     We  stayed at Stovepipe Wells, an old "bungalette" resort  in Death Valley.  There we met Jim Galvin,  who spends six or seven weeks there every winter and has been made an honorary member of the staff.  He sets up his telescopes on the patio outside his room and invites passersby to look through them.  We saw sun spots during the day and Jupiter with its moons at night.  While I was looking at the craters on the crescent moon, Judy and Jim talked  astronomy and cameras.  Later, when were driving through the desert  from Stovepipe Wells to Furnace Creek, we decided to get out of the car and look up.  It was absolutely quiet. The night sky in Death Valley was like a black bowl of stars, with bright stars all the way down to where the dark sky meets the dark desert.
Wild horses
Old coyote
   The next afternoon, as we left the busy National Park Service visitors' center, we saw an old coyote cross the road.  I swear he paused and looked both ways before creaking at a slow trot across that road.
 As we rounded the bend at the ghost town of Amorgosa,  two  wild horses and a foal emerged from the desert field and ran behind the old  opera house.
     We returned to Las Vegas On Super Bowl Sunday, to stay one night before catching a plane to Phoenix. The porter at the Excalibur had told us with excitement about all the athletes who would be gathering there on Sunday to watch the football game. We decided not to stay at a casino hotel.   The Motel 6 near the airport turned out to be clean, quiet, and comfortable.   The small, spare room was done in a 60s retro style. It reminded me of a ship's cabin in the clever way everything fit together.
Kathe, Lisha, Maggie with pendant
Wild horses of Scottsdale
Judy in the snow
     In Phoenix we hooked up with our friends Kathe and Lisha, who live in Southwest Colorado.  We stayed in a two-bedroom apartment that Kathe had found, a comfortable place for talking and eating and catching up. We poked around the art galleries of Scottsdale, where I discovered the oils of Benjamin Wu and the bronzes of David McGary.  Judy liked the big copper horses in a central fountain.  Kate and Lisha had just been to the Tucson Gem and Mineral show.  They'd given me a pendant made of variscite, so we pumped  the rock and crystal dealers in Scottdale for more information about the stone.  We talked about the Enneagram all the way out to the gift shop at Frank Lloyd Wright's Taliesin West,  and then kept Enneababbling on into the night.
    Judy and I flew home to Portland and were greeted by snow.  We were compelled to sit by the fire and read.  It felt like the gift of four more days of vacation.
Backyard Buddha emerges
  

Friday, February 7, 2014

Beloved community wedding 2

Sheila the wedding planner

Should we score the lasagna ?

Ministers of meat
  We had seven weeks to plan the wedding.  The menu for the wedding reception evolved over that time, with input from Sheila, Tina and Jessamy.  Tina helped refine appetizers of smoked salmon, cheese and rosemary crackers, fruit, and candied nuts.   Jess suggested that we find a restaurant whose food we like and ask them if they would cook for us.  The lunches at the Painted Lady coffee house are superb.  Jill, the painted lady, made us lasagna, green beans and winter slaw.  Mike Sweek, whose grandmothers cooked for Oregon ranches, offered to make pulled pork.  The great neighbors Janet, Robert, Kelli and Randy contributed large chunky green salads from the California Kitchen.  Judy chopped enormous bowls of Waldorf salad. We copied Anne and Bobbie's chocolate/raspberry wedding cake, but  the decoration was plainer with the simple design we made.
Ukulele players/ food haulers
Jill, the painted lady
Sommeliers
     Judy organized the transport volunteers.  Kelli and Randy carried the wine.  Janet and Robert picked up the cake at Beaverton Bakery. Donna brought the fruit salads and the flowers, and the ukulele gang transported the food from the Painted Lady.  Paul took care of the beer.  My sisters went on a frantic hunt for potato rolls.  (Who knew the groceries would be sold out of potato rolls after Christmas?)  Jess finally found them in Edmunds, and brought them with her on the 3-hour drive.  Sheila, whose lists had guided us for weeks, brought the linens and chafing dishes and glasses and serving dishes to the church.
Crying during toasts
    Saturday morning at the church, family and friends went into action.  Sheila, a superb organizer and leader,  was in charge.  Rose rolled silverware into napkins, and the women prepared the appetizers.   They all united in shooing me out of the kitchen. After the ceremony Betsy and Les served wine.  We all nibbled and mingled in the foyer while the guys moved tables and chairs, transforming the sanctuary from a church to a dining room.  The kitchen crew laid out the feast, and we ate.
We cut the cake
 
Sammy
Dressed up for the occasion
     We wanted people from the different parts of our lives to get to know each other, so it was gratifying to me that the seating arrangements were a success. One guest described the sound of the party as a "happy symphony of talking and laughing, rising and falling in the background."  Nancy,  the generous friend who offered to take photos, roamed the room, climbed onto chairs, and captured the spirit of the afternoon. My good family passed around sparkling cider, and we heard fine toasts.  We cut the cake and laughed and visited.
Brother and sisters
     Afterward, the men put away the tables while the women toiled away in the kitchen. (If I had it to do over again, I would  hire someone to do dishes.) Josh danced around the wooden floor with a big dry mop, and the kids had their own party.  Simone ran around in circles full speed, laughing away, with her cousins chasing her.
Simone leads the chase